Daripada nangkring di arsip blog w yang udah 2 bulan, mending kita post aja.

So, telling about something that I wanna talk about is the way that I like the most.

Most important things that I wanna share w/ u gengs is the way that I ruin myself w/ my own journey. On my own, I love doing what I wanted to.

Like,

I love being myself. I hate pretending but in every journey for every people, meeting w/ other people sometimes we have to pretend ourself when communication w/ others. But, now, I think, it becomes more grateful for me cause I don't have to make a lot of pressure if I have to pretend myself. If I wanna talk to other people around me (for now), i think, it might be because they're men and I think it's easy to them for not being a brittle person.

Pretending is a must, u can't just think about yourself, u have to think to other people's feeling. Don't be selfish cause in ur world isn't full of urself. Don't be mad at the simple problem, u know, big problem sometimes we have to think about how to simplify it, and then if u mad cause the little problem such as u are offended by people around u especially one of my friends, dahlah.

One of my friends told me, "Coba kapan kamu emosi Ca, kasih tau saya. Tak coba nya. Kamu ga pernah marah sama saya soalnya."

I mean, I did. I did mad at him. But I can't mad with shouting like rude words or just be quite for so long, I just can't. So, he wouldn't know. If I am mad, the first thing is my emotions really increased, but Alhamdulillah, isn't going for too long, I don't know but I think my emotions are really under control. If u ask "how to" I can't tell u, that's really hard to explain how I can manage my emotions. I just let it flow. I don't know how my emotions really going, is that bad or good I still don't know, but, I feel like I'm grateful with this.

That's how I can manage my emotions especially mad one.

If I'm baffled or bewildered maybe stressed, I'm just going to convenient store, get the Ice Cream and now mostly everyday I buy that one dessert without lunch first. Is there a thing that I'm stressed mostly everyday? I think so, but I'm so relieved that I just buy an Ice Cream not other something bad. In the middle of my stress, there's a lot of something special that I've got.

Sometimes, when I want that Ice cream, I'll try to Invite Caca, she's my partner's work daughter. "Ca, ayo beli Ice Cream", she's very excited when I told her to bought that dessert. When I see her smile, I'm excited too. And the unexpected moment was, recently Caca and her dad go outside, I don't know where the destination was, but when they comeback, she gave me an Ice Cream too. I never talk to her what the Ice Cream that I love, but when her dad told me, "Caca bilang, "Mba Ica suka Ice Cream nya yang itu", I really shocked when he told me that statement. Caca is 3rd years old. But she actually know what Ice Cream that I frequently buy. Again, I never told Caca what type of Ice Cream that I like. But Caca know really well.

And the other special things that I've got too.

Like this one,

and there's a story when I want to sleep in the afternoon, really, in a workplace, in the office, I just slept there. you know, Bang Heru, he knew that I went to sleep, and then he turn off one of the lamps in the office, just only because he knew that I went to sleep there. Where did I know that story? It's because, I really didn't sleep, kek mana w bisa nyenyak tidur di kantor yang isinya cowok-cowok semua? untung ada Caca di sana yang nemenin w, tapi tetep aja w gabisa tidur sedangkan mata w udah sisa 5 watt.. In my office, there's a space for sleep, everyone can sleep there. So, yeah, I can't handle my sleepy, that's what I mean. Or, sometimes, when my abang-abang just landed from project in the outside from the island, they know how to bring something, such as small gifts. and I love when they're together in the office, throwing jokes special ala bapak-bapak😂